Conflicts
at work, home and life take place pretty constantly. How we learn to handle and resolve them can
say a lot about our abilities as managers and leaders. Conflict can be extremely detrimental to
relationships and organizations if they are not handled properly. However, a complete lack of conflict can be
just as detrimental causing poor decision making that can lead to only one side
winning out. When a person is skilled in
conflict resolution they can help ensure resolution and a mutually beneficial
arrangement for both sides.
I have witnessed conflict many times
throughout my life; however, I have only been a part of a mediated resolution
process once. In this case, I was
actually the offended party seeking for resolution for myself and others. When I was in college I worked at a book
store, and I was hired on as a part time employee. This came as a relief since was new in school
and desperately needed the work. I loved
to read and help others to find books they would enjoy. Although the pay was not great, the work was
fun and enjoyable. The manager of the
book store, however, was a very poor leader.
He never really talked to the employees unless it was to tell us how we
were not measuring up or selling enough books.
Anything that happened in the store that he did not like was automatically
all our fault. We were never praised for
any successes and never given incentives to succeed. Anything good that came from leadership came
from the assistant manager. She was
essentially the leader of the store and did a great job of cleaning up after
the head manager.
As the holidays approached, the business in the store
picked up drastically. We all worked
late hours and the store stayed open later for the season. Just before Christmas a number of us received
a card in an envelope. Thinking this was
a Christmas card and a nice gesture, I opened it and began to read. Taped to the card was a typed note that
stated although the store was grateful for my work, I was not needed anymore
and I would be let go. I was not the
only person to receive a card like this.
When I approached the store manager I was quickly dismissed. Living in a college town it was not uncommon
for business owners to treat their employees poorly knowing they could easily
hire new ones. Not wanting to lose my
job, and seeking some form of restitution for others that were being let go, I
decided to call the human relations department of the book store. On top of all this, I found it pretty
offensive to be told I was being let go just before the holiday through a card
with a typed note on it.
About a week after calling human resources, I was
contacted and asked if I wanted to sit down and discuss what had happened. In the meantime, the manager of the store had
quit to move on to something that didn’t require leading people. When we met up we sat down with the assistant
manager and a mediator. I first
expressed my concerns, my desire to keep my job and issues I had with the
leadership at the company. As we went
back and forth, and discussed what had happened, the mediator would step in to
lead the discussion. After watching the
video on conflict resolution, I noticed some similarities between the manager
in the video and the mediator in my situation.
In both situations, the mediator or manager sought feedback and my
opinion on the matter. In my situation,
I was asked what could be done rather than giving out cards to employees. I suggested that the manager talk to each
individual separately, let them know they appreciate their work, and although
they could not keep them on, they were grateful for the opportunity to work
with them. The mediator in my situation
would occasionally repeat what I had said and asked if they understood me
correctly. The manager then told me she
would work hard to improve morale at the store and strive to treat employees
better. Although I did not continue
working with the company, I felt I was able to at least help those that still
worked there.
When attempting to resolve conflict, it is critical to
keep in mind what is truly important. In
my situation, I could have focused on my own need for retribution, rather than
the need to help others still working at the company, but did not want to speak
up and lose their jobs. In the video
they state that “hopefully by resolving the conflict both parties and the
business itself will gain” (Berman, 2008) . I am grateful for the skilled negotiator I
was able to talk with, and for the assistant manager’s desire to improve the
working conditions of my prior coworkers.
Even though it has been many years since this incident took place, I
learned a great deal about conflict resolution and leadership.
References
Berman, J. (Director). (2008). Conflict Resolution
[Motion Picture].
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